A Beginner’s Guide to the Maltese Festa

Never been to a Maltese festa? Don’t worry. Here’s everything you need to know to blend in like a seasoned professional ahead of some of Malta’s biggest upcoming festas.

First, follow the lights. If an entire street is glowing, decorated and looking considerably fancier than usual, you’re probably heading in the right direction.

Next, listen for the band. You will almost certainly hear it before you see it. When it arrives, simply follow everyone else and look like you know exactly what’s happening.

Then come the fireworks. Your job is to look upwards and occasionally say something appreciative. Be warned, however, that fireworks are a serious matter. Somewhere nearby, two people may already be debating which village does them better.

Food is equally important. Festa calories operate under different rules, so something fried and delicious consumed late at night is practically compulsory.

You should also prepare for crowds. That peaceful stroll through the village may quickly become a slow shuffle involving hundreds of people, several relatives you haven’t seen in months and somebody stopping directly in front of you to have a conversation.

Finally, remember the golden rule: never casually suggest that another village might have a better festa.

You are entering dangerous territory.

Instead, enjoy the lights, music, food, fireworks and atmosphere.

Congratulations. You’ve survived your first Maltese festa.

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